Shooting Star

Like the shooting star that crosses the velvety night sky, I took wonder will I fade away like that someday.

I sometimes lie upon the grassy plane looking up at the sky wondering, what it will be like to catch a falling star. How boundless the sky is, how magnificient it is, casting a magical spell upon everyone under that starry sky.

It took my breath away the first time I truely open my eyes to see the many wonders that laid out in front of me beneath the deep blue velvet sky. How vast it is, showing me the many wonders and long lost secrets to the human kind.

Laying here, silent as the stars above, and as far as I can see, I wish that such a wonderous night will not come to an end. The boundless knowledge that we could learn from those stars, if only they were able totalk. Their knowledge, old as the ground that we walk upon, and ancient as the wind that whispers so, I would give anything to learn these ancient languages, to understand all that has come, been and soon to come.

Soon as the sun that starts to peak out, the night will fade away, hiding all the stars behind its brightness, not to be seen until the night’s dark embrace.

Picture found on Photobucket by AnnaMollyMadison.

Nightfall

It is such a relief to me that night has finally come.
I longed for it, loving everything about it. It is only in the night that I can let loose and truely be myself. The silent night that will not despies me, nor reject me.

The stars that shine so brilliantly in the skies, illuminating and navigating the lost souls. The bright moon the lights my path and show me the comfort that I seeked. It is in the night that I can cry without remorse or fear of showing signs of weakness.

To me the darkness that wrapped around me is like a blanket of security which can shield me from everything. The darkness that covers up all my fears and protects me safe and sound within its’ arms. My safe haven.

Sometimes, when I watch the shooting stars, I feel like a million arrows and needles has strike down upon me as painful memories attacked me mercilessly. How I wished for it all to stop sometimes, yet their beuaty continue to entrance me as those memories continue to invade my mind.

Such deadly beauties, yet soon darkness befall upon me as my breathing even out. With a final glimps of the beautiful night, I soon drift away into my own world of darkness. The very darkness that I always craved and yearned for. 

Picture found on Photobucket by commline.

This “Thing” Called Love

They tell me that love is a ‘thing’. I find that it is not a ‘thing’ at all.

When we ignored this ‘thing’ called love, we are the one who regret for having let go such a chance to meet someone wonderful. Yet sometimes, we do not seem to realise that until it walked out of our life. 

When we chose to take in mind this ‘thing’ called love, one of us will get hurt. A one sided love affair that we try so hard to get the person, yet in the end, we get hurt when faced with the harsh truth. How hard can it be to grab the attention of the one we seek, yet we will only be ignored.

This bittersweet ‘thing’ called love, seems to have a mind of its own it seems to me. No matter how much we try to work out a relationship, in the end one of us will get hurt,  and feel regret. And in our life, we will not be able to avoid this ‘thing’ called love, and neither will we be rid of it. For everyone of us have to go through those bittersweet times sooner or later.

Picture found on Photobucket by rollnbm.

El Tango

Remember how we used to dance?

The fire, the passion, the heat, the tauting. When the music is played oh how the body will move along in rythm with it stirs a spark of fire, turning it into a raging flame. How sensually it draws me in like a moth to a flame. How the body response plays  so much of a role, though it may seems so wrong, yet its beautiful as sin and full of it.

I could still remember how heated up I was, the song and movements burned within my heart, enslaving me. How seductive and powerful it felt to tempt and be bold. It’s provocotive yet sensual steps now a drug to me, in which I know I will never be able to get enough of. How lips will meet by a breath length and yet drawn away again.

They say the best of tango dancers will not know the true meaning of Tango unless they have been hurt in their life. Perhaps they are right, Dancing the Tango is heaven, the tempting, the courting and all the sensuality just comes out from all of us. The everyone around us just seem to vanish, leaving only the whole dancefloor to us as they watch our intricate yet almost provocative dance.

I do not love this dance for how everyone just turn head to look at us admiring. Rather, I dance for the heat passion that seems to ooze so much sensuality in such innocent steps. Pressing our body together, tempting and then pulling away to see that look on your face, it was almost priceless. It’s thrilling to see such expressions as the game of temptation continues on into the night.

A hint of smile in victory and a taunting yet challenging look in the eyes, as I curled as finger waiting for your next step. How fun this is, to see how you move, closing in on me  trying to capture me, and yet again I managed to slip through your grasp. It had been fun yet there is always something missing in finding the perfect partner.

Though you know what they say, finding the perfect partner usually begins with the heart first. So I’ll continue on with my dance of Tango until I find the perfect partner, I’ll continue my sensual game of temptation.

Picture found on Photobucket by nanita35.

Good Night

Good night my dear sweet child

I see you sleeping so peacefully, bringing to me the little melody that I was taught by my own mother. How sweetly the lyrics goes, singing to me of lost lullaby and the wonderous night sky. Of how the stars would twinkle and shine like precious stones, or how brightly the moon now shines down upon you. Listen to my song well my dear dear for soon I will fade away along with the night.

I will return soon to see you, to sing to you again, of this dear sweet lullaby that I was taught. My touch though whispers like the night’s gentle breeze, will bring to you my love from a far away place, watching you always as you grow up into a pretty girl. My time is shortening now, I have to leave, but don’t worry for I will always be by your side. Just listen to my lullaby to remember me by, my dear little angel, my precious star.

Picture found on Photobucket by Gudy50.

Letting Go

I used to let a balloon go every time I feel upset. It scares me to think that I have been thinking about you even after we parted.

My heart still aches from the pain, making breathing difficult for me from time to time. How I wish that we are back together but I know that it will never be. Parting is never something sweet, they are such painful deeds. If I had the chocie, we should have never meet. I thought that I was strong, but I was not, I misjudge myself. Now as I sat there wallowing in my sorrow, I see your face reflected in my memory everytime I thought about the time we spent together.

How did it ended this way? At which point of our relationship went wrong? I did not intend for these all to end so abruptly, I wanted to know you more to be you with more. I regretted not spending more time with you and perhaps that is what caused our relationship to come to an end.

My tears continue to fall for days, crying over what we used to have together. And now my greatest fear has come true. Many told me to let go and forget, but how could I? The pain I am suffering now hurts so much in my heart like a sword has been stab right through it. I could feel my heart plunged down whenever I remember how we broke up. It hurts so much, I wish that it would all just go away.

My hand trembled as I held onto the strings of those balloons sitting there trying my hardest not to cry again. MY eyes were already puffed and swollen from crying to much and I already lost my voice. If anyone were to look at me they would see a lifeless person in pieces on the ground wallowing in sorrow so deep enough to drown myself. I could not bring myself to release the ballons, to release the memory of you and our time together.

I wish I could but I could not bring myself to. I don’t want it to end like this. I did not want this to end at all. As my tears spilled forth again, I cried again not wanting to let go of these memories that I hold dear to my heart. They were already meaningless I know but they were just too precious to me. What we used to have were gone but I did could not let go of them still.

“Let go,” they say. How easy it was to say, if only I could just carry the actions out. Maybe later when I could stop crying and seeing your face surfacing in my memory.

Picture found on Photobucket by BlondeBabe5722.

If Only…

I used to have so much time for myself, preening in front of the mirror, looking pretty turning heads of the unknown and demanding attention wherever I go.

Falling in love was grand yet there were times when fear arises. I love the time we spent together simple doing nothing together, listening to the ocean waves washing along the shore. Though I should have seen it coming. The day that we broke up.

So this is the end of our sweet romance I guess, who would have known that I would fall again. Feeling the pain, I thought that we had a connection in the past. Why won’t these tears stop flowing? I have been through these a few times already I should be able to handle it on my own now right?

I wished we had more time together, to get to know each of our flaws. The warmth you gave me, how my heart race everytime you told me that you loved me. Now they are nothing but whispers to me. Another memory or a dream I tried to treat this as, but everytime I stop to think, you appeared. I wish that I could turn back to the time we met so that I would not have fallen for you that day.

It hurts so much deep within,do you know that? Even if you did what good is it to me now? It is already over. I would give anything now to turn back time erase these memories so that I would not feel the pain I am going through. So many things has happened. Why must it happened to me again.  Why won’t your face just disappear?!

As I sat in my favourite quiet little place, I thought about us, and the time we spent together. Those sweet memories of us together now seemed meaninglesss to me. My heart just aches so much that it is hard to even breath. If only I could go back in time, I would erase all these away, so that my heart will not ache so much now.

Picture found on Photobucket by Petercheeks.

Never Meant To Be

I tried desperately to cling to those memories of us together. Taking pictures, one after the next.

Looking through the box full of photos that I had collected, I see you in them. How long was it when we first started out? Now that you have left, I feel the pain of it all after the months or years that had passed by. As my tears stained the photos that were scattered messily on the ground, I fought the urge to break down. I miss you, I miss you, I miss you.

No amount of tears could ever bring you back to me, if they could I would gladly cry my eyes out for you. I know others were talking behind my back about my reaction when we called it off, never to see one another again. It hurts me inside and yet I had to resist the urge to go running back to you for my pride did not allow me to do it.

They told me that time would heal everything, but apparently it was not true for me. Years had passed and yet I still miss you everyday. Today when I was cleaning out the closet, I saw the box of memories that I had long forgotten. How nostalgic it was, remembering the good and bad times. I longed for those days of us being happy together, blissful and never apart. I miss your scent, your hugs, your kisses, and your gently caress.

The tears dripped down my cheek silently as I looked at the scattered pictures, our memories together came flooding back to me. I bite down on my lower lips, and clenched my fist, willing the tears not to fall. Yet they did. Why did I torture us so, it may have pained you but it hurts me even more. Every time I see a couple in the park they reminded me of us. I miss your smile and how you looked me in the eye.

At first it was because of you were overly kind to me, I felt guilty, I could give nothing much in return and yet I feel confused. I want so much to be back in your arms to feel your warmth, but somehow it ended so awkwardly and I dare not face you. If I were to see you again, I know I would not be able to resist you nor have the face to look at you properly without my eyes betraying my emotions.

I’m sorry is all I could say. Sorry that it has to all come to an end. Walking away with my head held up high when I still could. The tears were already falling freely when I turned my back to you, I did not want you to see my crying face so I carried on walking with my back against you, never turning back to answer your call. 

Though others may have called me heartless for turning my back and walking away from you never looking back once, but it was for the best. So long my love, it was for the best. For our sweet romance had to come to an end. Goodbye for now and forever and till we meet again, in our next life. Maybe then I would get a happy ending with the one I love.

I wish you the best of luck my love, for my life has come to an end, though it pained me so, but at least I know you will move on ahead.

Picture found on Photobucket by MiNi_S2 .

Hello Teddy

Hello Teddy,

I still remember you from long ago. Do you still remember me? How long has it been since we last spent a full day together.

Remember how I would cry to you and only you, spilling my heart out to you? I know it was long ago and you were the only friend that I had. How many time have we seen mummy and daddy fighting with one another? I can’t remember how many times was it. They would always send me up to bed with you, waiting for us to fall asleep before they start their argument. I would silently cry against your fur, soaking you with my sorrow.

You were there with me through the worse and best of time, and I would never part from you. You would never treat me badly or attempt to leave me. I remember the day when mummy and daddy finally left one another. The night that daddy left mummy, she was crying to me for a long time. Teddy you were there, I’m sure that you remembered. Mummy said that “Daddy was leaving us for another one, and would never see us again.” I was sad i remember, but I did not cry in front of her. I cried that night once I was sure that mummy was asleep, I cried for the lost of my daddy, at least you were there with me through it all.

We were a bit of a mess when daddy left, but at least mummy had started to gather herself that time. We were happy but not as happy as when we were all together. I could see that mummy has already lost the fire in her eyes, until she came home one day with a smile that I had not seen for a while. We are happy again, as mummy continuously comes home with that smile. 

Teddy I love both mummy and you the most in this world. I wish to see mummy smiling like this everyday of my life.

Yours with love
Krystel

Picture found on Photobucket by Rm5121.

Years

The old tyre swing is still here after so many years.

I remember it all as though it was just yesterday. We would come down to the water hole and play the whole day long, lazing beneath the sun. How carefree we were, and all the fun and mischief that we get our selves into.

How much we spend our time together in the past, swimming away from everything even from our parents. It was our paradise during the summer. The cool water that washes our body as we had countless of water fights. The many fun that we had during our vacation usually comes to an end with us having a campfire under the stars.

After so many years do you still remember those times? I know I do. Now it has been passed on through my family, who knows maybe one day we would meet up again through our children, to carry on where we left off.

Picture found on Photobucket by nicolerosan.